


Before Peter and After

by Sangerin



Category: A Tangled Web - L. M. Montgomery
Genre: F/F, Femslash, Yuletide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-12-22
Updated: 2004-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-25 02:28:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1626728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sangerin/pseuds/Sangerin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was not a moment in Virginia's life that had not been shared with Donna.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Before Peter and After

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Charabok

 

 

Virginia told people that her heart was buried in Rose River churchyard simply so no one would realise it was really the property of Donna Dark.

Donna was at the heart of all Virginia's posturings, although Virginia never quite realised how much she was laughed at for them. For her it was a mask - like any other mask worn by a Dark or a Penhallow, to keep the rest of the clan away from the secrets of the self. It would never do for the clan to know that Virginia Powell (nee Dark) loved Donna Dark (nee Penhallow). After all, such a thing - like divorce and addiction - simply did not exist on Prince Edward Island.

**Almost Sisters**

There was not a moment in Virginia's life that had not been shared with Donna. They were born the same day, and thus the Darks and Penhallows expected birthday celebrations to be joint occasions. When the girls reached school age, they walked hand in hand down the lanes to the Rose River schoolhouse, where they shared a desk, a slate, and the contents of their lunch pails.

Perhaps another girl would have resented it - the fact there was never an event that was hers alone. But Virginia loved Donna. At first she loved Donna because she was expected to. They were cousins, and almost as close as the sisters their mothers truly were. She loved Donna's sweetness, and she stood in awe of Donna's courage. Donna who stuck out her tongue at Peter Penhallow - _in church_! Donna who knew how to manage Drowned John Penhallow and his famous temper.

And Virginia loved that while she was by Donna's side, it was Virginia who would be considered the prettier. Donna was dramatic, her long dark hair making her complexion appear all the paler. When they played in the woods beyond Drowned John's back gate, Virginia would play the fairy princess, but it was Donna who had the interesting roles in their games - the heroic prince, fighting a dragon to save the princess locked in a tower; the prince turned into a frog, fighting adversity to gain the love of the princess. One afternoon, playing one of their games, the time came for Prince Donna to kiss Princess Virginia so that the happy ending could occur. Instead of kissing Virginia on the cheek, as she had done so often before, she kissed her on the lips: lightly and quickly.

'Why did you do that?' asked Virginia, startled.

The two girls were holding hands. Donna looked down at their joined hands and replied, 'I just wanted to know what it felt like.'

'It felt nice,' said Virginia, and greatly daring, leaned in to kiss Donna back.

The kisses they shared that afternoon, and on other afternoons, became their special secret.

**Across the Gulf**

Drowned John sent Donna to Kingsport Ladies College for a 'finishing' year, and nearly broke Virginia's heart in the process. Virginia's father considered his daughter to be finished enough for life on PEI, and her mother, with two other children to care for, considered that Virginia would be more use to the family at home, rather than filling her head with nonsense in New Brunswick.

And so, on a foggy September day Drowned John drove the trap from Rose River down to the Bay Silver railway station. Beside him sat Donna, slightly nervous but revelling in her brand new uniform, and beside her, clutching Donna's hand, sat Virginia.

The two girls whispered to each other as the trap rattled along the red island roads. They made promises to write every week, 'Every _day_ ,' said Virginia. She elicited a promise from Donna not to like any of the KLC girls better than her, and Donna giggled as she agreed, saying that no one could possibly replace her darling Virginia. Virginia smiled on the surface, but beneath her skin, she glowed with this tiny acknowledgement of Donna's love.

Virginia stood on the platform beside Drowned John, and tears ran down her cheeks as Donna boarded the train. Donna didn't cry. She kissed her hand to Virginia, and hung out the train window as it began to move away. 'Goodbye, Father. Goodbye, Virginia, darling! I'll tell you all about it!' Donna's face was lit up with anticipation of the joys of boarding school, and Virginia watched her dear friend being taken away from her.

Drowned John gave his niece an awkward squeeze around the shoulders. 'Come along, you silly wet rag. I've got to get you home - your Ma wants you home in time to help with the milking.'

Virginia's life felt very dull that year. She was a good girl for her mother; helped her with the children and the farm, joined the Rose River Ladies Aid and sang in the church choir. Her mother finally lengthened Virginia's skirts, and Virginia stopped playing in the fields with her boy cousins and learned how to put her hair up. At a bonfire party thrown by one of the Penhallow cousins, a boy called Ned Powell got behind Virginia and pulled out all her hairpins. She never noticed what was happening until her golden hair fell onto her shoulders. For five minutes, until she remembered she was supposed to be grown up, Virginia chased Ned around the bonfire while the other young people laughed. Virginia swore eternal hatred of Ned Powell from that night on.

When letters arrived from Donna every few weeks, Virginia would take them to a favourite spot among the pines where they had played as children. She would sit and read the letters in the cool green of their old playhouse and try to picture the grand old house Donna told her about in Kingsport. She tried to picture Donna's classmates - girls Donna told her about with an amount of affection that almost worried Virginia until she got to the end of the letters, which Donna always signed, ' _Always yours_.' Donna seemed always to be doing things with a girl called Susan - Susan's parents had invited Donna to spend the Christmas holiday with them, as the journey back to Rose River was considered to be too long and too expensive. Susan and Donna had gone moonlight snowshoeing one night. Susan had given Donna posy of flowers on her birthday - the first birthday Donna and Virginia had ever spent apart. Susan and Donna had played the lead roles in a play the English class had got up. In one of their whispered conversations Virginia had made Donna promise never to kiss another girl, but Donna breezily told Virginia that she and Susan had kissed in the play, without ever mentioning her promise.

**Orange and White**

Virginia's feud with Edmond Powell didn't last very long. The summer that Donna returned from Kingsport, Ned came to stay with his cousin Barry Dark. In the way of the clan, Donna and Virginia were thrown together with Barry and Ned for most of the summer. Nothing was settled that summer, but Ned expressed an intention to take over a distant uncle's farm in Rose River, and so he stayed in their social circle for the winter. By the time spring came around again, Barry and Donna were engaged. Donna's engagement felt to Virginia as though it was the end of everything, and so when Ned Powell proposed one afternoon while they were walking along the shore, Virginia accepted him. She had forgiven him by now for letting her hair down two years before, and conceded to Donna one evening that Ned really was quite sweet.

When the war broke out and their beautifully planned double wedding on Drowned John's front lawn was replaced by a rushed double ceremony in Charlottetown, Donna was still insistent that the brides should wear orange blossoms in their hair. Donna's sister Thekla found some, but Donna sent Thekla out of the room while she fixed the blossoms in Virginia's hair. She handed her share to Virginia and then leaned forward and kissed Virginia in the old way.

'You will always be my Virginia,' she said. 'Things will change, now, of course. But I was always yours: Barry has only come along recently.'

Virginia managed not to cry: not then, as she shakily pinned orange blossoms into Donna's hair, and not later, when she stood with Ned in front of the Minister, with Donna and Barry on the other side. She didn't cry when she and Donna stood on the platform at Charlottetown, waving until the train carrying their khaki-clad husbands disappeared from view.

At first Virginia didn't cry even when the telegram came telling her of Ned's death. She had barely had time to set up her little farmhouse on the ridge to her satisfaction. She and Donna were in the kitchen discussion how Virginia would furnish her parlour - Virginia favoured the romance of draperies and rich colours. The telegraph boy knocked on the back door, and at the sight of him, both girls froze. Slowly, Virginia got to her feet and crossed the kitchen to take the piece of black-bordered paper from his hand. She read the words, but it wasn't until Donna put her arm around Virginia's shoulders and said 'Oh, my poor darling,' that Virginia truly realised what the telegram said. Virginia had been truly fond of Ned Powell, but as long as Donna was there, holding her, Virginia felt safe. After the funeral, when Donna went back to the house of her in-laws, who were beginning to clamour for her presence, and Virginia was left alone in the great bed that had belonged to Ned's mother, Virginia cried all night, feeling the absence of Donna, who had slept with her there, rather than for Ned, who had not.

**Amid the Tears**

Virginia found that she almost envied Donna her plain white cross, 'somewhere in France'. So much more romantic than dying in a training camp. For a little while, Virginia had been Rose River's only War Widow. Then, in flash, not only was her dearest friend distraught, but her status in the community was taken away.

Donna had always loved Barry more than Virginia had loved Ned, anyway. So it was right that it was Donna who was truly upset by her husband's death. And Virginia made sure that she was by Donna's side through it all. She encouraged Donna to move back home, closer to her own little farm, and away from Barry's parents and those memories. She encouraged the memories of their childhood together, and it was Virginia's idea to spend every rainy evening together.

With Ned not going to come home, Virginia had fixed her parlour up completely in her own taste - rich draperies and deep colours and all. On a visit into Charlottetown the Fall after Ned's death, a fellow Widow from Ned and Barry's regiment had given her some sandlewood incense, and Virginia had been drawn to the sweetness of the scent. Every since, the rainy evenings Donna and Virginia shared had been accompanied by burning incense and obscure teas from the corners of the world.

Virginia had always hoped that one day it would seem right to invite Donna to come and live with her, two War Widows together, sharing the burdens of their lives alone. But the time never seemed quite right. It wasn't that it wasn't common - Mrs Howard Penhallow and Mercy Penhallow lived together at Maywood, with Mrs Howard's little girl Gay; Mrs Clifford Penhallow and her sister Rachael Dark also lived together, with Jocelyn Dark, who was as good as a widow, living apart from her husband. But if Virginia invited Donna to live with her, then she would know, even if no one else did, that the reason for the invitation was the hope that each night Donna would kiss her goodnight the way she did at the end of their rainy evenings together.

**Mahala**

Virginia quite liked Cousin Mahala, even if Mahala didn't seem to like her much in return. Cousin Mahala was not considered to be entirely right by the majority of the clan. Even Penhallows and Darks had to admit to some black (or, at any event, somewhat gray) sheep in the fold: the Duncan Darks, for example, were considered to be distinctly on the murky side. Cousin Mahala, however, partially because she spared the clan her presence for eleven months of the year, was considered to be more of a silvery colour. She made life more interesting while she was among them, but they all breathed great sighs of relief when she departed. Uncle Pippin's assessment of Mahala was that she was 'something of a queer fish'. Virginia, however, used to look forward to the times when Mahala would come down from her retreat in the West and dispense her wisdom among them.

Mrs Clifford Penhallow gave a tea to celebrate young Gay's sixteenth birthday. Virginia and Donna had attended, as had all the women of the clan. Mahala, too, had been there, dressed as mannishly as one could among a clan where trousers were not an item of clothing worn by a female. For much of the tea, Virginia had felt Mahala's eyes on her, and she was not very surprised when Mahala arrived at the Powell farm the next day.

'Virginia, dear, you are becoming obvious,' Mahala said as she accepted the offered cup of tea. 'I'd advise you to stop looking at Barry Dark's widow as though you wanted to eat her.'

Virginia had only just taken a seat with her own tea, on the porch that looked out across the hills towards Drowned John's farm. Her cup clattered against the saucer.

'You wouldn't credit it, my dear, but I do understand what you are feeling,' said Mahala, kindly. 'You're not alone in the world, you know.' Her eyes twinkled. 'Come up west with me one day. Oh, the cats around here will gossip and shriek about it for a while, but who knows - once you get over that Dark girl of yours, you may find that there's more to the world than you realise.'

Virginia eventually found her voice, but rather than tell Mahala to leave, which she had been intending to do, she asked softly, 'How did you know?'

Mahala smiled. 'I saw the same look on your face that was on mine when I was your age.' Mahala told Virginia about her own girlhood, and how she had found her way to places in Canada that Virginia had not even dreamed existed.

'I haven't the courage to leave,' Virginia said eventually. 'I'm happy with my life as it is now. We're closer than sisters, and nothing will change that.'

Mahala shook her head in pity for Virginia, and embraced her warmly when they parted at the end of the afternoon. 'Think about my offer, dear. Come up west for a time.'

After her conversation with Cousin Mahala, Virginia's outward devotion to the memory of Ned Powell became even stronger. It was said among the clan that her weeds got even weedier, and it was after this that the fateful words regarding the burial place of Virginia's heart had been said. Virginia was careful around other people, but also became even more devoted to spending time with Donna. Donna was her lifeline, and Virginia wasn't about to give her up.

**Aunt Becky's Levee**

Less than five minutes after Virginia had been given an opal ring by Aunt Becky its bad luck had already struck. Donna Dark's eyes had met Peter Penhallow's, and Donna fell fathoms deep in love. Worse still, Peter did as well. Virginia knew the signs: knew them and dreaded them.

She did the only thing she could do: tried as hard as she could to keep them apart and to keep herself and Donna together. For a while it seemed that she had succeeded. Peter left and Donna stayed. For some months Donna seemed once again to hate Peter as she had as a child. But Virginia knew better. Had not she sworn eternal hatred for Edmond Powell barely two years before marrying him?

When Virginia stood beside Donna in the Rose River church on her dearest friend's wedding day, she looked down the aisle to where Cousin Mahala sat in the back of the church, and began planning a trip up west.

 

 

 


End file.
